August the closing of summer 2020

I started to write this months post at another doctor appointment in the waiting room for the hundredth time this year and honestly I lost count on the number of times I have been waiting rooms this year alone. But I didn't want to start like that for this month and to share that but hey it's life.

We are officially near the ending of the year and August is here, shortly the fall season will come and go before we know it, christmas will be. But I hope these next few months till the new year are full of blessings for all us. Even tho this the closing of our summer days of 2020 are ending. I hope they Slow down, full of memories and fun regardless if we have wear a mask wherever we go. Let's take these days to be the ones soaked up by happiness and supporting each other even if the act is simply asking, " How are you doing?". Do more facetimes, Do more voice texts and be there because the seasons are changing, restrictions change, life routines can change all over again.

Go watch the lingering sunsets each evening, grab your favorite drink and watch the beauty of God and the universe has created for us to enjoy. In times like these we should appreciate them more than we did previously. I find myself racing each evening to finish everything I have on my plate of lists to watch the color show even if that's a few seconds before it's dusk. I find myself back under the stars like I used to such a long time go right before bedtime. Better than any show I can find on any device right now. I can even tell you last night when the world around was asleep, light's off across the valley that I looked up to those same stars that lingering each night for about thirty minutes doing absolutely nothing besides being. I found myself at peace, reaching my hands up the stars like I did like a child once upon a time ago and attempt to catch one in my palm if I could. There were so many in the sky last night that it took my breath away and it felt like dream, no sounds of anything besides the light midnight breeze moving a chime. So if you haven't done that in a while I think you should just to unwind from the world right now, the best medicine I could find. And honestly I think the stars are the absolutely gorgeous thing about life and no matter where you are in the world, they are always there with you the darkness they are share their light when we can't see seem to share ours on some days.

With that all being said I have being feeling Creative like a burst of energy came into my soul and I think it's time to share a few written pieces that I have tucked the back of things left unfinished to share with the world. I feel alive again like the wind changing directions, seasons changing in a blink of an eye. I feel like me almost to a thousand percent. I find myself drifting the world of writing in my head, faster than any pen on paper or typing on any keyboard. If I am watering the herbs, taking care the zoo or doing work I find myself dabbing little sticky notes and hiding them away in a notebook. Just saying that made me a smile a little , typing all this and hoping this makes sense to at least someone out there.

I found myself grabbing for my camera again which I haven't done either in months, I am getting inspired more when I see something that caught my eye. To the point I have ran through my house to grab my camera before I missed the opportunity when I only have seconds left. Just imagine three german shepherds very concerned for me that they are on my heels because I am just flying through doors like nothing. I can promise you when I can run back outside with a camera or two that we all forget the breaks going down the deck steps. At least I can say I got my cardio in each time that happened. And I missed that part getting excited and laughing over a moment like that when I know it doesn't make sense unless you are there witness the same thing. When was the last time you went chasing something that made you inspired that you need to capture it ?

I guess my point of this snippet of a monthly post is that enjoy moments of life right now, stop and watch what's exactly in front of you. And what has inspired you recently that made you feel giggy , that made you smile so much that your face hurt? Put down your phone more often, turn off the tv, the computer and watch the beauty around us that we often miss when we are busy with life. Just being is more important, press pause go in solitude in nature. Before we know it , rain will come around, the colder temperatures will come upon us and the snow will be covering the world around us. And remember your safety is important, wear the mask when you should and check on your loved ones. Just don't forget to just be in this timeframe and what beauty lies around us.

In closing I just want to leave you with this: You are loved, you are worthy of everything and someone is always in your corner to catch you if you were fall. And Being is Okay to be right now, you don't have do anything else besides that .

Anyways,

Love Misread.💕

P.s I will try to be on time for the next monthly post and keep a lookout for anything new to pop up shortly.

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Change in the air -July 2020

Here we are in July 2020 and we are on the July where we in the middle of summer Vibes!

Let me first say this month alone in the last ten days have been different for me ; Full of emotions, highs and lows. And I have been have reflections on my own beliefs, my thoughts and a reason for it all where we all in life. I have keeping myself away from my phone, the media outlets, talking less. I know those first few lines are hard to read and understand even for me. I spent the last ten days figuring out what to say, how to say it and when to post , when to share because the change in the air has me at a lost for words.I know has a writer is just write and it will make sense in the end. By that being said, I hope this makes as I continue to type words, sentences and maybe paragraphs even I don't know but I am sharing what's in my heart.

I am writing this six days after July fourth and the previous Paragraph I wrote last month and yet it still feel right to start this month's blog post like this.

I think this month the feeling of the world in a weird state, hit home for me at least and yet there was good things that happen during the last time I posted and some other sad things in between. I miss the hugs, the smiles and the many coffee dates I had in my calendar. I look back on this July fourth as a weird one without all the festivals through the weekend but more blessed that I had my Father around, my momma and my stepbrother in one place and we got the time to be together. Because previous fourths we would never together, cooking, laughing during those years. Some this year was quite special to me.

Also this month I lost another furry friend of mine, I used to babysit and take care of a sweet doggy next door to me. He was sixteen years old and I knew him for eleven years of his life! He was a sweet boy and few times he went on his walk bouts from his home, he would always come to my front door. His name was Scooter, I called him Scoot. He was my Favorite model, He knew how to work the runway in his own way.

A very special person to me and in my community,passed away suddenly. Her name was Jennifer, she was loved my many and she touched many. I only knew her for a short time but it felt like I knew her forever. I knew her through the Rotary club and she was friends with both of my neighbors as well.She was a strong woman and always had a giving heart. She had a smile that you knew it came from her heart because her eyes would light up as well.She little spot outdoor venue spot in the heart of town where people would get married, have birthdays at with the most beautiful Lavender garden. I was blessed for the amount of time I knew her and witnessing all her kindness to others. Our Community has been hit hard in recent months with losing people suddenly and unexpected. To suicides that should have never happened and families hurting. And losing a friend my age with a full life ahead of her being stabbed in her car and she took off to the hospital and while getting there someone ran a red light that killed her. Her name was Angelina she was beautiful and she was kind to me and everyone around her. She would be missed dearly by everyone who knew her.

Life is an unpredictable sometimes and sometimes it challenges us during the worst of times and yet during the best of times to. Looking at the whole of the world right now during through every angle. I think sometimes is life real right now or fantasy. I know one day, we will get back to normalcy, we will understand each other better and we will learn the lessons we need to know through this time period of history.

I have my own ups and downs in the last six months that I can't believe where I am right now with it all. I wasn't feeling myself since my birthday of this year, I was told my body is fighting something and yet there was no reasoning behind it all just a guessing game. Each day wasn't the greatest, there were lost of sleepless nights and tears. Breathing was hard sometimes, I had to stop working out , I lost ten pounds within weeks, I couldn't eat food that I would normally eat. I went to many doctors, did many tests and scans. And let me tell you I had so much gel on me that I think I could make another me with it all combined. Fyi when they say it will wash off easily don't take their word for it I had gel in my hair (three washes later , by the way). I few reactions to medications that made me feel even worse than I was feeling already. I had a few panic attacks during a few scans that I had to be confined like an the MRI but that was actually the easier one and the during the EEG; which was the worst for me.

Conclusion to this all, I have lumps in my breasts that are hormonal related that might not ever go away and yet they are painful. They found tiny cysts in my throat and one my thyroid gland but nothing is life threatening. The popping in my ears and my sinus acting up because I have an allergy syndrome thing that might or might not with me forever, I have to wait it out. My first time in my life experiencing allergies. My organs look good, my heart is in good shape. They found a tiny tiny little cyst on my pineal gland in my head which is very common in woman and very very very tiny like lots of....

I can say from six months go to till today , I actually feel better slowly, being more active again. In all of all I am happy about it and I am getting close to getting closer to feeling normal. To all my friends thinking I was being a more of a hermit than normal that's why before the world was shut down. And I am blessed to have the family I got that made me keep pushing through it and help me to the many lovely doctors appointments even if they had it seat in the parking lot of hours. I love you.

There were some good things that happened, I had the chance to collaborate with a company the last few months. The company name is Neveo, If you follow me on instagram; you will see the collaborations through my story.I love this company and the app was so easy to use. I love there concept of helping generations of families connect without social media. Just by uploading pictures in the app each month and simply adding a caption. And they take care of the layout and send it the person that journal is for. I am smiling about talking to them because right now in life connection is important. If you would like to try them out for a few months , I highly recommend you do! I got a code for you "FAMILY" for three months for half off! Think about it something tangible to give to someone you love.

I will working on some edits that I have been meaning to finish and open the store on here that I put on hold since everything that happened. And I have writing a different style of writing than I used to , something fresh and I have been releasing a few pieces on another platform to see if anyone loves it anonymously before I share it here. I have been thinking about a few pieces that I have been circling around in my head the last few weeks. You never know a new written piece might just pop up here, subscribe if you haven't yet to get the lastest first. I feel more ready than ever to be the creative as I was months ago. So prepared once everything is ready, all my social feeds will be full.

I want to leave you on this note. Take a pause on life, ignore what chaos is around you right now. Close your eyes, breath in for a moment and take a breath out. Look at what's in front of you and where you want to. Who you want to me and if you need to make a change in your life. Make something right about your past, do it. You are loved, you wanted , you have gift even if you haven't discovered it yet. Make the most of the next months leading to 2021, spend the time with love ones, spend time working on you. And most of all things will work out , things will be normal; I am sure of it. Believe in it all and see what happens next.

That's my catch up.

With love always,

Misread

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Father's Day June 2020

Happy Father's day to every father out there!

Today's the day I gush about my father a little and maybe give him a little hard time about those funny moments we shared throughout the years; that he will also moments he will never live down either. Let me first say , Dad you are my best friend and I love you no matter how difficult you have become in your old age.

Now let me continue chatting about you a little more. I have many many memories with you, some very funny for my benefit and some very sweet memories as well.

My favorite one still to date is that first trip to San Francisco, you know that moment well. It was my first time experiencing the city you grew up in after coming to USA at the age of twelve . I only experienced the city at age twenty - four because I promised if I ever went to the city by the bay , that my first visit would be with you. Back to that special memory where there was so much laughter that ,I lost my own breath and I wouldn't even move much after that. Remember on our last day out in the city, we visited the Sutro Baths?

Where we walked the trail down from the parking lot top side of the lot because you were the tour guide of this trip , I let you lead the way. And it was cold that morning if memory serves me correctly to , you just had a cup of coffee. You said and I quote ," Let's go this way , it will be the shorter way and easier to come back". To find out later we took the long way down but we did get some amazing pictures of the point and finding a heart shape rock in the bay. Then we arrived to the bottom of the baths after an hour and half later I believe, you took me into the cave tunnel after that. I remember having my own skin crawl out of my own body due to not liking narrow places. But you got me there and we I did get some amazing pictures from underneath. And I remember you holding my hand all the way to the tunnel cave until we got wet then you moved out of there faster than I could catch up fast enough either. I remember you saying , " No sense of both of us getting wet ". I said back, " Hey I thought we are a team here. " You said ," Yes, but I can't swim". At least I can say when doubt there is humor in the works, always with you. We wondered around a little more after that, watching people taking picture, birds playing in the baths and watching the waves crash against the hill side. It was a gorgeous day to watch nature work while we took in the moment being together.

The best part of that whole three hour experience leaving the baths. Yes, I know I can hear you saying it already, "Here it comes". I have never laughed harder then ever that day and probably never will never laugh that hard again. Walking up those big wooden stairs to the parking lot which let me reiterate again," This is the Easy part". We were the only ones probably taking thirty minutes to a climb that hill side. We only walked up ten steps with me a step behind you when you said," How many steps are there? Who put these here, I want there name ? And why isn't there an elevator here? " All I could response with laughter and tears forming at my eyes " This was your idea to goes this way . You said you are the expert here." And then you were hold on fence post like you ran a marathon in ten minutes before the steps part happened. People pass us by going either direction, you made it clear who ever was going down the steps while bring out of breath yourself, " You don't want go down there." They would responded with " why sir?" each time. Then you would responded back with ," Because there are no baths down there and these stairs are a b.... to climb".

After reaching the top of the stair case with me holding you up the best I could while making sure the cameras weren't going to fall of my shoulders, that the staircase it's self had at least fifty- three steps because you made sure to count each step. When you reached the top of stairs and had Rocky Balboa moment and reach your arms in the air while saying , " I made it at last, Thank you Jesus and where's the car". Then the famous words came next, " Don't you ever bring me here again , I not walking down the steps or up these steps again. Too many stairs, I need ice cream, where's the car. Oh those tourists don't know what's about to happen to them when they go down and come back, it's not good".

I was almost near the ground at that point because you were saying all of this without missing a breath and yet walking like you did a major work or had a few drinks in the last few moments before walking up those steps. And we all know you don't do that. I had to say, "He's fine, he's just getting a little old for his age". When I said that someone meaning you were walking fast to the car to show me who's the slow one is".

One of the best moments and day of my life and yes I still have the video. And no I won't delete it either, good memories fills the soul up and maybe it will end up on YouTube one day soon.

You are my best friend, partner and crime and yes, you are the best dad a daughter could ask for ! Don't let that all go to your head that I said the best. I love you very much no matter how many days you drive me crazy, I wouldn't trade you for anything.. Maybe just one little thing. I look forward to each day with you , every memory shared and more laughs to come. At least I didn't share the time you got stuck in the lake in Bishop, yet.. Maybe next year I will. I love you more than you ever know and that's a fact.

I am a lucky daughter to grow up with my dad and have a great step-dad as well in life. And I think about my step-dad Danny often because I know around this time each year my little sisters don't get spend the day with him or see him. And his birthday just passed a few days ago as well. But I know he is looking down at us each and everyday, protecting us. My favorite memory with him would be the time when I was a little and I just woke up from sleeping in my big girl bed for the first time as they called them back then. I walked down the hallway to the kitchen to see making pancakes because he promised when he got home , we would have pancakes. And the time we ate peanuts together while putting together a giant Winnie the pooh puzzle together.

And to all my uncles, brothers and cousins in my life you are all great dad's and will be great dad's in the future. I love watching you all with your kids and the bond you have with one of them , very beautiful in my opinion.

I know this year some are experiencing their first year without their dad, brother and grandfather. I wish I could ease the pain the reminder that they are gone. But remember they are gone physically but spiritually they are around always, looking out for you , watching you create memories. They are in the wind, they are the clouds , they are showing you signs they are around as well. I know they are happy to know you, watch you grow up and had the physical time they had with you , teaching you all what they were taught from their father's to pass on the knowledge on to you. If I could loan out my father to you, I would in a heartbeat as but I know it's not the same. And I know, you would return to sender as well.. he can be a handful and he knows it.

Edited statement from my father: " There were more than fifty-three steps , try five hundred and fifty-three steps ".

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